I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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