we're blogging at a bar
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I'm jealous of your bromance
Farmville is her only friend.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
