Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
