ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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