I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize