No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
