I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
