awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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