just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
