can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
