Its about making memories worth repressing
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
