I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
