once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
