i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
