nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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