So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
