My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So many bounce houses so little time
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
