I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
