I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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