Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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