spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
We left the knife in your bed.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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