Are we in a gay sports bar?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
