I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
