ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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