i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
