well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Randomize
