My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
