yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
