My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize