We named our party play list daddy issues
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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