found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
