we have officially lost it.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
