wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
