If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
