Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
