and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You ruined the universe
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
