Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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