The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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