do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize