And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
