She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
