Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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