Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
