All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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