Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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