Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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