And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
