Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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