it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize
