last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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