i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
